Getting Back In the Game After Divorce

Seeing that over half of all marriages end in divorce — most within 5 years — it is not surprising that there are a plethora of recently divorced men now re-entering the dating pool. Divorce is obviously a stressful, and often excruciating, process thus resulting in a mindset not conducive to a productive dating life.  There are some simple tips that recently divorced guys can follow in order to make their return to the dating world more productive and less stressful.

Take Some Time

Most experts advise to take a little time to “grieve” for the marriage after its expiration.  The amount of time necessary varies by guy, but statistics have shown that “rebound” relationships commenced immediately subsequent to a divorce often end in the same fate.  Take a little time, hang out with the guys and gain some perspective on your newly found single status.

Be Picky

Many recently divorced men desire to re-enter a relationship expeditiously.  They have grown accustomed to the benefits within a relationship, and suddenly becoming single again is often a shock.  Some give into the craving for a relationship on any terms and settle for the first available prospect that comes along.  Divorced men should assiduously avoid this temptation and play the field for a while before settling down again.  Being picky at this stage is healthy, and it will help to ensure that you aren’t just going through the motions in order to replace a piece of your life which is now missing.

Get A Hobby

Avoid the temptation to solely focus on re-establishing a relationship right away.  As indicated, spend some time with your male friends — there is no longer a wife to nag you about where you are going and what you are doing.  Focus on an old neglected hobby, or get a new one.  Devote some time solely for yourself.  Doing this will enable you to renew your single persona and be of a state of mind conducive to successful dating and courtship.  It will also help to purge the recent bitter memories which no doubt accompanied your divorce.

Take It Slow

Don’t rush in upon finding someone new.  Give the courtship process time to work and quantify whether she is the right woman for you.  The propensity to accelerate the relationship is even more pronounced when both you and she are recently divorced.  Be especially wary of quick courtships in this scenario.  Enjoy dating and the freedoms you still have while doing it — soon enough, you will be married again and look back upon your temporary freedom with envy.  Take full advantage of it while it lasts.

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1 Comment

  1. mjay says:

    Don’t Get Remarried

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